I developed this little analogy at the bar tonight so it is raw, but I think it works. However, there is one instance where my theory will not hold true and that is slaying vag while in college. Whole different ball game so we'll exclude those four glorious years.
Seriously though, in both cases you have a ranking system for how you analyze the prospects. The rankings change over time depending on various inputs such as grades, extracurriculars, athletic accomplishments, body fat percentage or even hair cuts. In their most simple form there are reaches, safeties and targets. On the extreme ends of the spectrum, there are the unattainable and the undesirable.
In any social situation you will have some Harvard's or Yalie's walk through the door and while they are fun to fantasize about, short of 1600 on the SATs, you are not getting through that door. At the end of the night, who really wants to get through that door anyways? Probably all high maintenance and shit. Fuck 'em.
Then the reaches come strolling in. You know, the high end state schools (UVA, NYU, Cal, etc...), the Georgetown's, BC's, whatever. Attainable? Absolutely. It won't come easy though. Basically, you are counting on a down year in admissions or some pretty incredible luck. If you get into one of these places you'd be an idiot to turn it down. Take out some extra loans and make it happen but don't hold up your life waiting for it. Oh, and don't bother with any wait lists - huge waste of time.
We all know about the safties and the undesirables, the UMASS Dartmouth's, ITT Tech, U Phoenix', etc... As soon as you catch glimpse, you do your best to steer clear (i.e. color between the lines in primary school). Slump bust if you must but not a good plan. Certainly not looking out for your future.
Then there are those targets. Those URI's for example. You know you belong and so do they. You get caught drinking in the dorms but its no big deal because the privilege is mutually exclusive. It is the best of all worlds. That is where I want to be and so that is how I will approach the bar scene here on forward.
Regardless of how you choose to view things, I think we can all agree on this - in both cases, Asians always have the last laugh.
Ok, maybe just with the school part but I needed an excuse to drop the above picture. Work with me here.
2 comments:
somebody's bitter that they went home alone last night...
If you're smart you'd just pull a costanza. In a classic episode of Seinfeld George passes a picture of a smoking hot model as his dead fiance Susan. This gave him access to a whole new world of unattainables. Take a lesson from this and either: Forge credentials from Harvard to gain access to the boys club network that runs this country, or pay an 'unattainable' to take some photos with you. Place these photos in your wallet and cleverly face down in your nightstand drawer. There is no way this could backfire.
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