Now that Philip Rivers has solidified his place as Sunday Afternoon Douche Bag, its only fitting that we hand out the Monday Morning award. It is not too hard to guess where this is going, especially since it's not yet Tuesday so Easterfuck is out of the running. Yes, I'm speaking of the one and only Peter King.
I realize that bitching about a PK article is only slightly less played out than ripping Bill Simmons. It's been done all over the internet. I get it. But this week, I cannot help myself.
This is supposed to be the Peter Gammons of football. He is the most widely read and somehow, the most respected writer out of the NFL bunch. Yet on the day after what was arguably the greatest divisional playoff weekend in NFL history, he delivers the dud of the season.
For starters, the cover of his column includes a shot of his two favorite players Brett Favre and Tony Romo along with the aforementioned Sunday Afternoon DB. I hadn't read a word yet and already knew what I was in for.
Once into the piece, I quickly realized that the entire thing would be an extended version of his Aggravating Travel section. He basically summarized his travels from Thursday through Sunday in excruciating detail. The thing that really blew my mind was that due to all his traveling, he "caught snippets" of the Pats/Jags. Look, this isn't week 1 anymore where it is physically impossible to catch all the games. This is the playoffs we're talking about here. There were only 4 games played all weekend and all of them were shown exclusively with no overlapping and no interruptions. Yet you caught snippets?
The obvious question is what got in the way of the Saturday night game? I mean it couldn't have been yucking it up in a crowded Green Bay bar with a bunch of hysterical, overweight Packers fans right? Tell me you were travelling or the cable went down, something. Sadly we will never know.
In the offensive awards section, King praised the play of Tom Brady - "New England QB Tom Brady. I wish I'd gotten to see this performance, play in and play out. I caught snippets."
I'll tell you this much, I don't get paid to watch football. Most people I know don't. I watched all four games, "play in and play out". Most people I know did the same. How is it that a guy getting paid well in the six figure range to watch, dissect and analyze games only catch 75% of the action. Tom Brady's completion percentage was 18% higher than PK's watched games percentage. Good news Big Fella, there are only two games on next week.
Hey, but at least this week's column unearthed quality nuggets like this -
Now we had built up a little bit of trust and had been talking for a while. Here came the big guns. "This is going to sound weird," he said. "I dream about this guy. I dream that I'm going shopping with him. I'm not kidding. I'm just saying, we worship Favre."
I realize that bitching about a PK article is only slightly less played out than ripping Bill Simmons. It's been done all over the internet. I get it. But this week, I cannot help myself.
This is supposed to be the Peter Gammons of football. He is the most widely read and somehow, the most respected writer out of the NFL bunch. Yet on the day after what was arguably the greatest divisional playoff weekend in NFL history, he delivers the dud of the season.
For starters, the cover of his column includes a shot of his two favorite players Brett Favre and Tony Romo along with the aforementioned Sunday Afternoon DB. I hadn't read a word yet and already knew what I was in for.
Once into the piece, I quickly realized that the entire thing would be an extended version of his Aggravating Travel section. He basically summarized his travels from Thursday through Sunday in excruciating detail. The thing that really blew my mind was that due to all his traveling, he "caught snippets" of the Pats/Jags. Look, this isn't week 1 anymore where it is physically impossible to catch all the games. This is the playoffs we're talking about here. There were only 4 games played all weekend and all of them were shown exclusively with no overlapping and no interruptions. Yet you caught snippets?
The obvious question is what got in the way of the Saturday night game? I mean it couldn't have been yucking it up in a crowded Green Bay bar with a bunch of hysterical, overweight Packers fans right? Tell me you were travelling or the cable went down, something. Sadly we will never know.
In the offensive awards section, King praised the play of Tom Brady - "New England QB Tom Brady. I wish I'd gotten to see this performance, play in and play out. I caught snippets."
I'll tell you this much, I don't get paid to watch football. Most people I know don't. I watched all four games, "play in and play out". Most people I know did the same. How is it that a guy getting paid well in the six figure range to watch, dissect and analyze games only catch 75% of the action. Tom Brady's completion percentage was 18% higher than PK's watched games percentage. Good news Big Fella, there are only two games on next week.
Hey, but at least this week's column unearthed quality nuggets like this -
Now we had built up a little bit of trust and had been talking for a while. Here came the big guns. "This is going to sound weird," he said. "I dream about this guy. I dream that I'm going shopping with him. I'm not kidding. I'm just saying, we worship Favre."
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